Bad day at HallmarkBad day at Hallmark

Bad day at Hallmark 
 
Ever wondered what happens when Hallmark writers are having a bad day.........  

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M y tire was thumping.
I thought it was flat

When I looked at the tire...

I noticed your cat.

Sorry!

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  H eard your wife left you,
How upset you must be.

But don't fret about it...

She moved in with me.


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L ooking back over the years

That we've been together,

I can't help but wonder...

'What the hell was I thinking?'


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C ongratulations on your wedding day!

Too bad no one likes your husband.


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H ow could two people as beautiful as you

Have such an ugly baby?


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I 've always wanted to have
Someone to hold,

Someone to love.

After having met you ..

I've changed my mind.


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I must admit, you brought Religion into my life.

I never believed in Hell until I met you. 


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A s the days go by, I think of how lucky I am...

That you're not here to ruin it for me. 


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C ongratulations on your promotion.
Before you go.

Would you like to take this knife out of my back?

You'll probably need it again.


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H appy Birthday, Uncle Dad!

(Available only in Tennessee , Kentucky & West Virginia )


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H appy birthday! You look great for your age.

Almost Lifelike!


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W hen we were together,
You always said you'd die for me.

Now that we've broken up,

I think it's time you kept your promise.


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W e have been friends for a very long time .

let's say we stop?


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I 'm so miserable without you

it's almost like you're here.


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C ongratulations on your new bundle of joy.

Did you ever find out who the father was? 


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Y our friends and I wanted to do

Something special for your birthday.

So we're having you put to sleep.


))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))
S o your daughter's a hooker,
And it spoiled your day.

Look at the bright side,

it's really good pay